It started a couple weeks ago when I overheard my husband tell a friend that I was not obese, but I am fat and it bothers him. (For over a decade I have been the same weight and a solid size 12. In the past 3 years I have gained 5 pounds. Some of my pants are a little tighter around the waist.) Of course I cannot fit in my wedding dress thanks to genetics, several pregnancies, and menopause.
I can justify lots of things in my mind, but that comment still made me a little depressed.
Every other day the next week, husband decided to tell me that I must be stupid. One of the times he told me that was when I was trying to think of a polite response to an unkind comment he had made. I didn’t just want to blurt out the first thing that popped into my mind.
Even though I have several academic honors, can beat the pants off him in a Scrabble game, and can fix stuff around the house that he cannot, I was still bummed out by his comments.
The song that kept popping into my head was from Casting Crowns: Oh my soul you are not alone, there’s a place where fear has to face the God you know…” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjNZf878ISQ
My insecurities are really a form of fear. To get over them I needed to rediscover some of the depth of the love that God has for me. Would I let the opinion of my husband mean more to me than the facts laid out in the Bible?
I am greatly loved!