Oh, how quickly I forget!
This morning I started my day by creating a document which I could eventually tape on my bedroom door as a reminder:
The rest of the day stressed me out.
I had to make two different trips to stores. It wasn’t the fun kind like grocery shopping. It was school related stuff. (I am now a full-time online student.) It was snowy and slushy so my car is really coated with salt now.
The dogs acted like needy, whiny, crabby toddlers.
My biology experiment had some major setbacks.
I discovered that I wasn’t very prepared for the first major test in another class.
I am a bit overwhelmed in another class because the technology is brand-new to me.
Husband was running a circular saw while being very drunk. He always was a high functioning alcoholic, but operating power tools while intoxicated really is a dumb thing to do. And, as usual, there was the periodic need for me to shut the door to the outside.
Throughout the day I battled in my mind. Should I quit school because it takes me so long to complete everything? Am I too old to do this? Should I wait and go to school when my life is less crazy? Realistically, what kind of grade point average should I expect of myself? Why can’t I convince myself that healthy food tastes as good as corn chips and oreos? Am I taking care of my husband in a way that is pleasing to God?
So, here I am at 3am, unable to sleep, and nursing a pretty good headache. I took some medication and am now getting relief from the pain. Jumbled up snatches of songs are running through my brain. I am putting everything into God’s hands. I am His servant and I need to just go to bed. Everything will be fine. He loves me.